party saudi style (almost)

Last night I attended a party hosted by a young Saudi colleague to celebrate his engagement. There were about five dozen guests, mostly colleagues and friends of our host. There was no seggregated space for women because there were no women; it was an all male affair.

The event took place in a rented hall that was designed to resemble a castle, with high boundary walls complete with battlements. There was no moat, but a footpath along the frontage, and a moderate ramp from the gate to the road vaguely resembled a drawbridge.

Inside the gate was a nice green lawn. Our host and his family (well, half his family) were waiting there to greet guests. The intricate rules of Saudi style greetings are still a mystery to me. You just shake hands and say 'Assalamu alaikum' (peace be upon you) or 'Keifa Halak' (how do you do?) if you meet somebody you are not very familiar or intimate with. But in other cases you either kiss each others cheeks with loud smacking noises, or bump each other's cheeks several times in quick succession. What I still don't understand is how they decide whether to kiss or bump cheeks. And how many times.

My host kissed me several times, but I remained silent. When they kiss, they don't really seem to place the lips on your cheek, but make the noise of kissing from a slight distance.

Another very tall colleague stooped low to bring his cheek next to mine on my 5'-5" frame. After three bumps I thought that was enough and was moving apart, but he firmly drew me closer for a fourth and final bump.

I noticed that some students kissed their teachers on the forhead or on the top of their heads.

We (I went there with two other expatriate colleagues) were led into a long, rectangular hall room with sofas arranged along the walls. Guests who had arrived before us were sitting there and we went around shaking hands with each of them. After we took our seats, we were served with endless rounds of sweets and gawa, a very refreshing type of Arab coffee served in tiny little cups.

More guests continued to pour in and every few minutes we had to rise and shake hands with the new guests. Good exercise to whip up the appetite before dinner. About an hour and a half later we were herded to the lawn where dinner was served. I was expecting, rather hoping, a Saudi style dinner, where we would sit on the floor aound large platters of food, from which all of us would be eating with our hands.

Instead, the arrangemetn was for a western style buffet dinner. The food was eclectic, with Lebanese bread, Chinese spring rolls, Indian samosas, italilan style lasagna, several types of salads, hamur, chicken, vegetables and a platter of rice topped with a cooked lamb.

Our host and his father came to see how we were doing during our meal, just as we would do in our country. They thanked us for attending the party, which was of course our pleasure.

After the hearty meal, including desserts and a cup of tea, we took leave from the hosts and headed back home.

you have mail, at last

Yesterday I received a letter from my wife. My wife joined me here in March, and we are on speaking terms, so there is no need for her to send me missives. The letter actually accompanied some documents that she had sent before coming over here. It was mailed on 28 December, 2008, two-and-a-half months before her departure. The envelope has a Jeddah postmark dated 4 Muharram, which is 1 January 2009 according to the Gregorian calendar. So it travelled some 5,240 kilometres in about four days. That amounts to around 55 km/hr. However, the 1,200 kilometre journey from Jeddah to my mailbox in Dammam took around 130 days. That's around 0.4 km/hr. I had heard about the inefficiency of the snail mail service here, but I didn't expect it to be this bad. I am not sure though if I can blame the postal service for the delay, or if the internal mail distribution system in our organization was responsible. It reminds me what people told me about living in Saudi Arabia. You need patience. A lot of it.

meet the muttawa

Last Wednesday we had our first brush with the Muttawa, the dreaded religious police of Saudi Arabia. My wife and I were walking down the street in a shopping district looking for a shop to buy school uniform for our kids. At one road intersection, we were waiting with a crowd of pedestrians for the traffic to stop so we could cross the narrow, one-way street. A four-wheel drive vehicle pulled up and allowed us to pass. I was surprised and pleased because I don't see such gestures here often. I raised my hand in appreciation without noticing who was at the steering wheel. Once we were across the street, I heard someone yelling from behind. I turned around and saw it was the driver of the four wheel vehicle. The only word I understood from what he was saying was 'madam'. I had never seen a Muttawa before, but I had no problem recognising that this was one, and I knew he was exhorting my wife to cover her head. I waved at him and told my wife what it was about. She promptly covered her head with her scarf. That satisfied him and he drove off to find other deviant souls to save.

15 minutes later we had finished our shopping and were returning to our car when the loudspeakers of the local mosque blared out the call for prayer. We saw the same Muttawa drive down the street exhorting the people on the streets to go to the mosque (I guess).

I have read so many horror stories involving the Muttawa in the newspapers here, I was hoping I would never come accross one of them. I am sure, though, that the bad publicity they received is only due to a few bad apples. Newspaper reports also suggest that the government has taken measures to curb the excesses committed by the Muttawa. Friends who have been living here for some time say that the Muttawa have assumed a more low key profile in recent times. I hope it remains like that.